Shulou(Shulou.com)11/24 Report--

This article comes from the official account of Wechat: ID:chuappgame, author: Peng Chuwei

Games are a way for him to get back to life.

Game Night June 10, 2002, Game Night in Laotang Village, Shanghai Market.

Lao Tang Village is an ordinary urban village in Luoyang. At dusk, 10-year-old Huang Tsai walked out of the house of Lao Tang Village with his neighbors and friends of his age. They crept around several sturdy old locust trees and a whole row of bungalows. Spread their legs and ran, the destination is very clear-Internet cafes.

Huang Tsai still remembers the excitement that surged in his heart every time he was about to arrive at the Internet bar, accompanied by a sense of happy vertigo. It was an exciting night. He handed in the money and got on the plane skillfully. After a buzz, the computer started to run.

Huang Tsai and his partner went to the Internet bar to play "Blood Legend". The game was so popular at that time that he clicked on the white-gray "fan" icon and logged into the game. It was a private server, and the name he remembered was "Kaiyuan Prosperity".

What happened next is still fresh in his memory, and that is the source from which he can still remember his previous experiences today.

In the game, Huang Tsai was immersed in the scenery of the Ginkgo Valley, and his partners were busy beating scarecrows and raking cats. A voice suddenly mingled with the noise around him, and he vaguely heard someone calling his name. Huang Tsai looked up, looked over the rows of machines and caught sight of his mother. The partner lay down in his ear and whispered, "I see your mother. Run!"

The photo taken by Huang Tsai and his partner when they were young did not move. He had a moment of anger and was immediately extinguished by great sadness. Tears welled up and he had to bury his head in his arm. Soon, he was picked up and dragged home. When he got home, he was beaten by his parents with a broom on the grounds that he was "unwilling to play with things".

That's not the first time Huang has been beaten. A few months ago, he was severely beaten for buying a "Lightbringer" toy with the 6 yuan he had saved, for "spending money indiscriminately." Among the onlookers at that time, there were friends who went to Internet cafes together. They were fascinated by the cartoon "Lightning Messenger" together, and both of them were very excited when they bought toys. Now, the excitement soon turned into a cry, in which he saw the look in his partner's eyes as he was beaten to death.

On April 25, 2016, Huang Zai woke up from a dream and posted a circle of friends that read: "Wake up. I had a long, real dream about classmates, friends, people you loved, and people who hated you."

The eyes of the little friend also reappeared in Huang Tsai's dream, with little worry and a lot of indifference. The little friend was used to this kind of scene, either Huang Tsai or someone else. Anyway, he cried after being beaten. It was soon forgotten. It was no big deal.

Huang Tsai also felt that he had forgotten, but he often dreamt about the scenes and the people involved. He didn't understand why.

The question doesn't stop there. Although he was beaten for playing games, Huang Tsai was still infatuated with the "Blood Legend". He found that he could leave reality for a while while playing games, and he didn't know why. When he described this feature of the game to me, he said it was a "new world".

When he was in junior high school, Huang Zai lived in the school. He began to skip classes and go to Internet cafes frequently. In my memory, there is always a sour taste in the air of the Internet bar, as if it had been fermented. He ran in, often wearing airtight sneakers on his feet, and creaked at every step after sweating. He sat down in the Internet bar, opened a chat software called "Ispeak", and then shouted: "here we come!"

Huang Tsai likes the game icon of "Blood Legend" very much. The icon is a word "electricity", and every time he sees the color of the word and even his strokes, he has a feeling of being overcharged. What does that feel like? In his mind, the word contains all the things that are diametrically opposed to Lao Tang Village, and is synonymous with another world, with a sense of drama and ritual.

The channel hanging in Ispeak is the exchange place for the guild to which Huang Tsai belongs in the game. He was originally a loner in the game, focused on results, and liked to play strange and explosive equipment. However, in the Legend of Blood, there is another way to play monsters. Huang Tsai calls it "Nashabak". Shabak is a city, and in his private service, there are two gangs fighting for Shabak all the year round.

At the invitation of an old Guangdong player, he joined a gang called "Qiyuan" to fight against another gang "violent community". He is the youngest player in the gang and is often sent to work undercover on the opposite side, because even if he is exposed, no one will blame a child. He has become acquainted with people on all channels. The Cantonese player who invited him to join the game became his earliest online brother.

These days are one of the few happy times for Huang Tsai. As he grew up, his life was divided into three dimensions: women, games and working.

The time from primary school to technical secondary school graduation belongs to games. Huang Tsai and I talked about those days and jokingly described the Guangdong brother as "stupid, rich and handsome." After a while, he added: "Women like this kind of rich and stupid."

The brothers who played "Legend" didn't seem to have such a chance when they took a group photo at an offline party. During the Spring Festival holiday, he was cheated out of a sum of money by a woman who met through dating software, which showed that the other person was less than 500 meters away from him in a straight line, but he didn't know where she lived.

Huang Tsai made an appointment to meet again and again, but the other party never agreed. In the middle, he handed out several red envelopes, but he still didn't make an appointment. Then he decided to give up and asked if he could give the money back to him. He was blocked by the other party. It was New Year's Eve that day. Several red envelopes added up to 300yuan. He was a little worried. Finally, he found the woman's phone number, called, ignored the other party's complaint, but kept saying, "give me my money back."

For Huang Tsai, dealing with people has to learn gradually. Only two years ago, he was unable to say "give me my money back". In February 2010, he found a job with a traffic police force in a city in Henan province with a salary of 2700 yuan a month. His uncle used to work in a tractor factory in the city. He had a dormitory. His uncle asked him to live there for only 200 yuan a month. The family thought that this was the right way, but only he felt hopeless, because even if he had done meritorious service, he was still a co-policeman.

The work of the traffic police force is busy and idle, and in his spare time, Huang Tsai plays "knife Tower 2". In this game, Huang Tsai wants to kill the characters of enemy players and destroy each other's bases to win. The rules are not complicated, nor do they have gangs and brothers, human feelings and various scenery like the Legend of Blood, but this quick and convenient battle can just clear away all his grievances and troubles.

Grievances are everywhere. The traffic police have to work the night shift every six days and check for drunk driving. Once, when Wang Tsai came home from work, a neighbor stuck at the door and said that he had sent his grandson to school. He was detained by the traffic police for three rounds without a D license and asked him to help get the car back. He refused his neighbor, and the next day a urinal was placed at the door. For a long time, he was too smoked to cook in the house. Later, the team began to owe wages for four months, because there was no way to get the money, so he had to leave the city.

On the day he left, Huang Tsai fiercely completed a Jedi reversal in "Tower 2". When playing, he is very focused, directing his teammates, analyzing who is the best at playing and who needs to be dealt with the most, and figuring out what equipment can restrict others. At first it was a disadvantage, but then through his efforts, the situation was pulled back to balance of power, and the balance of power turned into victory. "hold off!" Huang Tsai said to me, "it is the three words that commentators often say in the competition, 'hold it up'."

The life of Huang Tsai is delayed by games.

In June 2010, Huang Tsai graduated from a technical secondary school and joined the crowd looking for a job that year. His first job was in a photovoltaic power company in Suzhou, where a teacher acted as an intermediary and introduced him with more than a dozen classmates. Life in the factory is very difficult, first of all, you have to go through a 3-month probation period, working 12 hours a day, with a monthly salary of only 1100 yuan.

After lifting the solar module in the workshop for five days, Huang Tsai had a fever. He only had more than 100 yuan on his hand and looked down on the doctor. If you look down on the doctor, you will not be able to issue a sick leave certificate, and if you cannot issue a certificate, you will not be able to ask for leave. In the end, he had to sit in a plastic chair and was kicked in the back by the manager on the grounds that he "thought someone was lazy".

Huang Tsai is not dissatisfied with his salary. He feels powerless and life is depressed. As for what is suppressed, he can't say, but he knows how not to think about it-- just play games. But he works 12 hours a day and has so few vacations that he can't play games. On the other hand, he feels more and more physically tired.

After staying for four months, Huang Tsai resigned with two friends who went to another factory. He also wanted to go, but was told that he was a hepatitis B patient and could not enter the factory. Huang Tsai thought of countless game nights when he was a child, when he often felt dizzy. He once thought it was a sign of happiness, but now it may be a sign of hepatitis B virus infection.

According to online data, hepatitis B patients are prone to fatigue, dizziness and may be relatively contagious, which not only makes Huang Tsai face all kinds of discrimination when looking for a job, but also prevents him from engaging in manual labor for a long time.

After every game of "Tower 2", Huang Tsai will stop and have a rest. Because of hepatitis B, his energy is not enough to support continuous play, and when he is thinking with tiredness, he often falls into memories and recalls when he was infected.

In the end, Huang blamed the infection on an injection 2000 years ago because his parents suspected he had ADHD and he was taken to a barefoot doctor who gave him a shot with a glass syringe that had been injected into others. He thinks that's how hepatitis B comes from.

When he found out that he had hepatitis B, Huang Tsai had a girl who had a very smooth blind date, because the virus would be transmitted through sex and mother-to-child transmission. He truthfully told the girl about himself. The girl cried several times, and soon the two broke up.

Because of this, Huang Tsai is a little resentful to his parents. But in 2016, when his parents were ready to move his family back from Luoyang to his hometown, he went back to help and opened a shoe counter in the county mall and hired two people. Business was good at first, and after taking antiviral drugs for a while, he began to try to find someone he could partner with.

Soon, a girl named Xiaoyu added Huangzi Wechat. Xiaoyu asked for Wechat on her own initiative. After a few conversations, Xiaoyu asked him out, and he went out. As a result, Xiaoyu took him to the hotel. After entering the room, Xiaoyu began to undress, scaring him away. He also asked the matchmaker to introduce himself to a date, the first one, because he ordered first, the other party said that he was male chauvinist, no more; the second, because he did not order, the woman said that he did not have a mind of his own and did not want to come out again. In his heart, he felt that all these were just excuses, and the key was that he was not rich enough.

Just as he was thinking about how to make money, the shoe store business became bleak because of peer squeeze. finally, he gave up the idea of making money and began to spend more and more time on games. During that time, he often played an old game called "Meteor Butterfly Sword" for his neighbor's children, which was his childhood recollection. In the game, he skillfully opened a map called "Luoyang City" to watch the children fight inside. Sometimes, he also demonstrated some advanced skills to the children, such as flying to the roof of the building with a "ninja knife infinitely", and the children exclaimed. At times like this, he will feel satisfied and stop thinking about whether he has money or not.

However, after staying at home for a long time, his parents did not like the way Huang Tsai played games, so they urged him to enter the factory.

The invoice left when I went to pick up the goods in Wenzhou was found in Guangzai near Shuilutai. Huang Tsai went to work at Foxconn for a period of time. When it comes to Foxconn, he describes it as "hopeless" as when he was in the police force. "it's a life where you can't see the future." He has to work shifts in the factory and report when he goes to the toilet. He can't sleep well during the day because the loudspeaker of the intermediary keeps calling, but he thinks his life is better than when he was at the photovoltaic factory in Suzhou.

Apart from summer, Foxconn doesn't work overtime much, the assembly line is easy, and the important thing is that he has more time to play games. He re-entered the Internet bar, playing the most is two games, one is the original "knife Tower", the other is "Perfect World International version".

In the knife Tower, Huang Tsai once reached a very high segment, which was a Blue Star, with a score of about 2000, for a long time, that was his way of proving himself. He kept talking about one match because he beat the former pro nicknamed "2009" and shared the screenshot with great pride.

Huang Tsai said that some of the girls who were not doing well at the factory, in Dazhai village next to Foxconn, may have gone into the sea on the spot, while the rest of them struggled to support themselves in various ways-playing billiards, mahjong, cards and Fengyue venues, and as long as he had games to play, he could continue to do so.

One day, when he was playing Perfect World International, he came across a task. The background of the task was: "A NPC named Guangzi lived in a village called Gu Fengkou. He didn't like life in the village, so he was going to go out and do something about it. He just left." In this task, he needs to look for young, middle-aged and twilight people in every corner of the perfect mainland.

Huang Tsai went around Gufengkou a few times and found more secrets-although Guang Tsai doesn't like life in the village, there are girls and parents who love Guang Zai in the village.

Huang Tsai has a girl of his own. When he returned home for the Spring Festival in 2018, after being introduced by his parents, he met a girl in Luoyang. They both had good first impressions of each other and had a deep relationship for a period of time. After that, he returned to Foxconn and missed her every day.

The story of Guang Zai reminds Huang Zai of himself, so he decides to find Guang Tsai for the girl.

Soon, Huang Zai found the young Guang Tsai. At that time, Guang Tsai was in the prime of life and was immersed in an adventurous life. Although he almost died many times, he insisted on his choice. Huang Tsai did not give up. After a longer search, he met the middle-aged Guang Tsai. At this time, Guang Tsai was a lonely traveler who was still outside, just because he was used to an adventurous life and did not want to go back to the village. Finally, he found the old Guang Tsai, who told him that he had seen a lot of things and people, but he didn't remember. Before he died, he just wanted to see the girl in Gu Fengkou again, but he didn't have the courage to go back.

Huang Tsai gained courage from Guang Tsai's story, and in August of that year, he resigned from Foxconn and went to Luoyang to work for a local self-media company. Before he went, he spent 2000 yuan on the ring. When they met in Luoyang, he put the ring on each other's finger and got engaged to the girl.

Huang Zai took photos on the way to see the girl. The work of the media is very heavy. Huang Tsai is responsible for writing entertainment news. He originally wanted to write his favorite history, but the boss didn't agree. In order to achieve the goal of "13 million readings a month", he gets up at 6 o'clock every day, goes to work by bike, and gets off work at 7 or 8 p.m., both wrists are numb on the way home. After working for a month, he got 1000 yuan.

One night in September, when his fiancee was driven home by a colleague's husband, Huang Tsai was stimulated to buy a car, which made him feel unprecedented pressure, and the two had a quarrel. Soon after, he saw his fiancee watching a movie with a boy selling mutton soup. After thinking about it for a long time, he decided to break up with the girl.

Huang Tsai did not understand why some people were afraid of marriage. he felt that marriage should be happy. It was only when he broke up that he knew that he still had a lot of deficiencies and could not bear the responsibility of a man. Huang Tsai tasted the taste of being lovelorn. Soon, he left the self-media company and left Luoyang.

Speaking of which, Huang Zai misses the life of Foxconn. He told me that at Foxconn, everyone was poor and poor, eating cold skin and squeezing buses together, and the girls in the factory were willing to share joys and sorrows.

After leaving Luoyang, Huang Zai did not want to endure hardships. Under a question of Zhihu, he wrote: "if you can let go of part of the responsibility, then you will not be crushed so easily." When he got home, he concentrated on playing games and didn't want to go out again. The parents explained their son's unwillingness to work with superstition, saying that he had been beaten by a broom when he was a child. According to folklore, the broom is used to sweep away wild ghosts. From the night he was picked by the broom, Huang Zai seemed to be a wild ghost. He constantly wanted to return to the world, but he was swept back again and again. Games may be a way for him to return to the world.

In March 2019, Huang Tsai found a way to make money in Fantasy Journey to the West. It costs 60 cents an hour to play this game. He spent 1000 hours on the game, in which he sold the items and money he got in activities and copies to other players through a system called "Treasure Pavilion" and settled in RMB. Slowly, he could earn several thousand yuan a month. When his parents didn't have a job, he gave half of his income to his parents and saved the other half himself.

Huang Zai makes money through trading accounts. Huang Zai plays in front of the computer for 12 hours a day and opens five numbers at the same time. As to whether it is still "playing games" to make money from games, Huang Zai just said: "of course it is more interesting than an electronics factory." Before leaving the electronics factory and going to Luoyang, Huang Tsai finished the task of Guangzai. He liked the end of the task very much: what Guangzi experienced was actually a long dream. After waking up, Guang Tsai found that he was still at that moment before his departure, he understood the importance of affection and love, so he stayed in Gufengkou.

Huang Tsai feels that this ending is a bit similar to his current situation. His ancient wind is in the game-playing games from an early age, going out and finally finding a way to make a living in the game.

At the end of last year, Fantasy Journey to the West ushered in a big update, and some changes in the mechanism made it more difficult for him to make money. at that time, when I asked Huang Tsai about his future plans, he told me, "I've already put the number on the shelves." now it's half sold. There are still a few numbers for sale, and we'll do something else after the sale. "

After the New year, Huang Tsai suddenly came to me and told me that he still decided to make money from "Dream Journey to the West", but he would have to work harder in the future. In order to encourage himself, he decided to relax for a few days and wait until February 1 to start work. Throughout late January, he played "Tower 2" during the day and watched a documentary called "Journey to the Edge of the Universe" at night. There was a concluding line at the end of the documentary, which he liked very much, so he relayed to me: "the earth is smaller and more fragile than we thought, and will eventually be swallowed up by the dying sun, but we should not despair, but should feel jubilant. We have experienced the wonders of the universe and should enjoy every moment in the sun."

Finally, Huang Tsai told me that games are the wonders of his universe, and as long as there are games to play, he can go on with his life.

(in the article, Huang Tsai is an alias. )

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